Things just get better and better!

This last week has been not only a hectic week, but also a very exciting week! I haven't had a job since October, I quit my job at Victoria Secret because of terrible management.  Brandon told me not to worry about quiting, that with his pay check we would still be able to afford all our bills, and still put a little money back. However, with him in Cali and me in Indiana we have two places we have to pay for and although we can afford it, its just getting a little stressful!  I also hated the fact that I feel like I wasnt contributing to our marriage.  I'm not out there with him, so I'm not able to cook, and clean, and help with anything for him, so I've have really been trying my hardest to find a job!  Well thankfully I got a call yesterday and have an interview today at BWW's.  It's a waitressing job, and even though it's not exactly what I would love to be doing, its a job, and it will help me bring in at least some sort of income so that I feel like I'm contributing financially.  So PLEASE pray that I get the job!!!

Totally unrelated, with all these websites on facebook USMC Gals, USMC Love.. and all these other "support sites" that keep miraculously popping up, I'm realizing that I have very little patience with people who are so petty, immature, and constantly complain.  Yes being a military significant other has its up's and down's, and being apart from them can be difficult at times, but seriously girls...Grow up!!! Girls post the DUMBEST things about complaining about missing their husbands, boyfriends, or fiances, and to be honest when I see the same girls posting over and over again, it doesnt make me feel bad for them, it makes me realize how immature they are.  Sure I miss my husband, and sure I'll make my status something about missing him from time to time... but if you cant handle a couple weeks apart while they are training how in the heck do they think they are going to last in a military relationship where there will be deployments and many more trainings until they leave the Marines?? Idk but I have also noticed how incredibly petty some of these women are, and how they will fight about the dumbest things- "Im better because im a wife and your a girlfriend," "My husband is better than yours because his job is this instead of that," "Im a better mom than you because of ..." I mean seriously .. do people not have anything better in their days to do than to degrade people and be disrespectful!  I'm so glad for the few girls that I have met through all this, but I'm glad I have deleted a bunch of them out of my life! I'm so much happier because of this!!

just something on my mind...

I haven't written much, because honestly I just dont know what to write!  It's only been a little over a week since I left California, and it feels like so much longer!! It feels like I haven't seen him in years!! A girl I have met through all these USMC websites lost her husband back in December, and honestly it hit home so much and I really have no idea why.  Sure my husband is also in the Marines, and sure his unit is getting deployed in the next few months... but Brandon isn't going, they already told him because of medical reasons he isn't allowed to go! So why does this other Marine Wife's loss it me so hard?? I don't have an answer to that.. the only thing I can think of his just the two of them were so absolutely in love and it just is so odd for me to think that God had a reason for breaking that love, especially in the world we are living in where so few people ever have a love anywhere close to theirs!!Every time I see this girl post pictures about her and her husband I have to hold back tears.. My heart truely goes out to this young lady and I really do hope she finds the best that life has to offer!

jumbled collection of my many thoughts ....

When I told my friends and family at home that I was going to California for a week to spend my birthday with my husband .. the acted like I was crazy and out of my mind, because he was home for 2 weeks right before I went out, so they just assumed that it was a pointless visit!  To me it wasnt... any time I get to spend with my husband is treasured, and means the absolute world to both of us! Some people also thought a week was too long... but who gets to judge our lives other than God.. who thinks they are so amazing that they are better than others.. im sorry but that just pisses me off more than anything, and frankly a week wasnt even close to enough time to spend with my husband!!! Im starting to really have a hard time enjoying being at home..each goodbye gets harder, and time between the goodbyes and hellos seem to keep getting longer, and then I come home and everyone seems to think I should just be this little bundle of joy..and no i dont go moping around all day, but the day I leave him Im always just down in the dumps .. but ill get over it jeez no need to give me lectures on how I need to not make someone my everything because "nothing lasts forever"... well to the person that said that .. Fuck you, just because your track records with marriages sucks doesnt mean that everyones is gonna end as fucked up as yours !!

As for my week in Cali...well it was AMAZING!! for some reason when we are at home, between our families both pulling us in opposite directions to spend time with them, and friends we barely feel like a married couple.. but out in california..its just us and we decide who to see, when to see them, and for how long...we have no commitments really other than brandons work, so between work we do what WE want.. and for us that is such an odd situation, but one we love and its how we want our entire relationship.  We have been discussing possible places to live after the Marine Corps.. and much to my dismay, he wants to move home..if it were my decision we would stay in california..but we will just have to find some sort of compromise!!  We have also started making some pretty big plans for ourselves..one of which being after this semester is over .. no matter what happens with college, im moving to cali , we were planning on me moving there this january but because of school I ended up not .. but we dont want this as a life anymore.. the distance, the unneccesary goodbyes and the continuous heart ache from being apart!!

Something, however, has been weighing on my heart very heavy for the past couple of days, and its just devastating me... but i feel like it may not be appropriate to prodcast that all over the web for the time being .. but just know if im a little upset or cranky and moody.. its because I have alot on my mind, and im really disappointed at the time being!! Ill get past it with the help of my husband and close friends and family, but just know it may take time!

Here Goes nothing ...

Our lives have been crazy to say the least! Brandon was able to come home for about 17 days to spend christmas and new years with us, and let me tell you it was amazing!! It's so weird to be married and living on opposite sides of the country.. but for now thats just the way things have to be.  Thankfully, this summer I will finally be moving to California to be with my wonderful husband and finally starting our "married life" together.  Suprisingly, I'm not scared to move across the country at all, and even though I barely know anyone out there I know that as long as I have Brandon I'll be alright! My biggest concern is that with Brandons unit's upcoming deployment, and with Brandon being told he is not allowed to go because of his shoulder, he will take his unit leaving without him pretty hard.  For those of you who don't know, Brandon has had alot of issue with both of his shoulders and this past March he had surgery to repair or torn rotator cuff, a hole in the muscle in his shoulder, and also an exploritory surgery to look for the "missing" bone from his shoulder.  These surgeries have limited his range of motion in his shoulder to the point of him not being able to lift his arm or reach to the side completly,  because of this, the doctors have told him he isnt allowed to go on deployment. Although this is great news for me because he wont be thrown into harms way, but at the same time it's still very difficult because he has to stay behind, watch all his friends leave, and cant do anything about it!

In turn, since his unit is deploying, most of the wives that I do know are planning on moving home during the deployment so we both will be in a state we barely know with very few people that we do know, but like I said before..since we have each other we will be fine!

I really should be doing so many more things right now instead of writing this post, because tomorrow bright and early I will be flying out to California to spend a week with Brandon, and this coming friday will be my 21st birthday so hubby is taking me to Vegas!! This is the longest I have ever spent in California with him, its usually just a long weekend that I go out for, and so I'm having a VERY difficult time trying to pack because I want to have plenty of clothes, but I also dont want to have 16 bags.  Please pray my flights don't get delayed with all this snow were getting here :)